Desi Jokes

Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Chut aur Aankh

Aankhon Ko Kaajal Lagata Dekh Kar Choot Rone Lag Gayi Aankh Ne Hairan Hoke Pucha: “Bahan Ro Kyu Rahi Ho?”

Choot Rote Hue Boli: “Arey Isliye Ro Rahi Hun Ki, Log Dekhnege Tujhe Aur Thokenge Mujhe“

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Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Shadi ke baad dulhan ko uski saheli ne phone karke pucha, “meri di hui
saree pahni kya ? ”

Dulhan : 1 hafte se kachhi to pahenne nahi de raha, saree kya khaak
pahnu…

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Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

ek dafa randikhane main chapa pad jata hay..dhandha bahat acha chal
raha tha…aik amma waha say guzar rahi hoti hain..woh rush dekh ker
aik gashti say poochti hay k kya hua..woh ghusse main bolti hay..kuch
nahi amma tofiya bat rahi hain…amma bolti hay acha..or line main
khari ho jati hay..police wala sab k naam likh raha hota hay…jab woh
amma k paas pohochta hay to bolta hay:..amma .. tum bhi.!!!..amma bolti
hay: BETA DAANT NAHI HAY TO KYA HUA ..CHOOS TO SAKTI HOON

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Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Sardaar Dukaandaar se : Bhai , aisi scheme kyon nahin chalu karta ki
500 rupiye ki kahridaari pe chudai free ?

Dukaandaar : arre , pichhle mahine hi to chalu kari thi ye scheme …
Parjai ne to ye scheme poore mahine mein 5 baar li.........

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Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Madam: Sabse jyada Protein kis k doodh mein hota hai?

Boy: 16 saal ki ladki k doodh mein.

Madam: Wo Kaise?

Boy: Usko peete hi bina haddi wale part mein bhi Jaan aa jati hai.

Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

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Ek baar ek bihari bhaiya sardar ke paas aata hai aur kahta hai ki
babu ji punjabi sikhani hai… Sardar hansa aur kahta hai ki tu nahi
seekh sakta punjabi, punjab taa khoon wich hundi hai…

Bihar agle din phir sardar ke paas pahunch jata hai aur kahta hai ki
babu ji , punjabi sikhani hai, sardar phir usko kahta hai ki eh nahi
ho sakda, punjabi khoon wich hundi hai….

teesray din phir bhaiye ke andar ungli hoti hai aur woh phir chala
jaata hai sardar ke paas ki punjabi sikhni hai, sardar kahta hai ki
bhaiya ji, punjabi khoon wich hundi hai, agar itna ungli ho rahi hai
to aao sikha deta hu punjabi..

puray ek mahine traininng chalti hai.. bhaiya pure dil ke saath
punjabi sikhta hai… end mai aati hai imtehaan ki ghadi, sardar
kahta hai ki aaj agal tu imtihaan paas kar gaya to tu pakka
punjabi ….

woh ek table pe pani ka gilas phainkta aur bolta hai ki isko punjabi
mai kya bolega …

Bhaiya : eh paani kinne sutiya ???? sardar kahta hai ki galat hai,
second chance

bhaiya : eh glaas kinne doliya hai ??? sardar phir kahta hai galat,
last chance

bhaiya :eh paani kinne doliya hai?? sardar kahta hai o chhad yaar…

sardar apne chhote ladke ko bulata hai aur table dikhata hua kahta
hai : oye chhotu idhar aa, aa dekh ..

chhotu table par paani pada hua dekh ke kahta hai : bhaincho, Eh maa
kinne ch udai hai ???

Sardar bhaiye ko kahta hai ki maine pahle hi bola tha ki punjabi
khoon wich hundi hai…

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Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Ek sardar ki gaand pe funsi nikal aayi, wo doctor se dawai laya.

Ghar pe pant utar ke sheeshe mein dekh kar dawai lagaane laga.

Aisa karte hue uske Lund khada ho gaya.

Sardar bola : baith ja Baith ja! Apni hi gaand hai. Baith Ja..

Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Ek Aadmi ek andhi ladki ko chod raha hota hai, Andhi ladki ne aadmi ke
neeche hath dal ke tatola aur poocha “yeh kya hai??

Aadmi : yeh tatte hain
Andhi Ladki: Kya yeh chut mein nahi dalogae??
Aadmi : nahi, nahi yeh bahar hee latkenge
Andhi Ladki: Dekho jo kuch daalna hai poora dalna, andhi ka haqq na
maarna

Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Mera Peecha MAT KAROOO!!!
Mai Sharif Ladki hun.
Bas ek bar bolungi …I L U.
Sirf ek bar milungi bas!!!
Kuch karna nahi…
Koi dekh lega
Bas upper se kar lo
Panty mat urato
Bas ek bar hi karwaungi
Sharam aarahi hai.
Bahut lamba hai
Meri chut mai itna mota nahi jaygaa
Jor se mat dalna
Bahut dard ho raha hai
Chuchi ko chuso
Kamar ko pakad ke dalo
Jor se dhakka maro
Bahar mat nikalo

Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Ek Sardar apne bete ke saath, Deepawali ke shub awsar par phatake udda
raha tha

Usne ek rocket uddaya, lekin woh rocket defective tha, Rocket phuzz
karke ulte direction mai kahin udd gaya

Sardar : Behn di phuddi, kahan gayee??

Beta : Kaunsi behan di phuddi, Amritsar Wali Ya Chandigarh wali

Collection Of Latest Desi Jokes

Ek baar baadshah akbar ke darbaar me ek santri tha. Uska naam lallan
tha. Uska record tha ki usne jiski bhi Gaand maari wo tarakki kar
gaya. Lekin wo khud santri ka santri hi rah gaya.

Ye baat feel karte hue usne khud ki hi gand maarne ki sochi, aur raat
ko minaar pe chad gaya aur apni hi maarne ka prayaas karne laga.
Lekin wo minaar akbar ke bedroom ke saamne thi aur achaanak akbar ki
nazar pad gayi, usne fauran sipaahi bhej kar usse pakad kar darbaar
mein pesh karne ko kaha.

Agli subah darbaar mein,

Akbar : Tum raat ko kya kar rahe the.

Lallan : Zille ilaahi maine aaj tak jiski bhi Gaand maari wo tarakki
kar gaya lekin mein wahi 500 rupaye kamaane waala hi reh gay.

Akbar : aaj se tumhaari tankhwaa 1500 ki jaati hai lekin ye harkat
dubaara nahi honi chahiye?

Lallan : Badshah salaamat, Abhi to sirf topa hi gaya tha…